As part of my hypnotherapy course trainee hypnotherapists do a lot of work on examining their motives - and often that involves the need to look the reasons why it feels good to help people or be seen as nice or behave as people want you to behave. 

It is a good thing to consider and  develop an awareness about your own motives, whether you are a therapist or just a 'nice' person.

The other day someone was giving me a lift in their car and an innocent incident reinforced that this is relevant even on the most casual of ;nice' actions and I thought it worth sharing.

It was in the evening so it was darkish with street lights on.  We were approaching a main junction where there was a very short queue and there was a car waiting to join our traffic from the left.  My friend slowed down and flashed for the car to come onto the road in front of her.  What happened next though was a surprise to both of us.  Neither of us had noticed the man standing at the pedestrian lights waiting for the lights to chance to green for him red for us.  He came walking across whilst the  light were still unchanged and my friend had to pull up sharpish.

It wasn't anywhere near an accident but if my friend had not been concentrating for just a minute or had flashed when she was a few feet closer it could have been.

That reminds me of the time when there was a double traffic queue down a busy main road near Heaton Park and I was driving in the centre lane that was moving more steadily than the outside lane.  Without my knowledge a car on the nearside lane had flashed someone to join the traffic in front of him but the car decided to come right across in front of me too and as I was unaware of this flashing it caused a near accident and an angry  man who thought he had been given permission to get where he wanted to be so exercised no caution.

This illustrates in a minor way the responsibilities that go along with being 'nice'.  Aspiring as i do, to free spirithood. it seems be quite contrare to say that there are rules and if you break them then you need to be able to take the responsibility for the consequences.  So I won't say that.  I will say that we have systems to deal with complex situations and it's perfectly okay to be a free spirit and to adjust those systems as long as you are willing to consider all the implications and possibilities first.  And whats more to take the responsibility for any possible consequences.

Different cultures have different systems that are culturally accepted so for instance,  sticking with the car theme. In France you are left much more to your own devises when driving hence, to me who is not culturally used to it, the chaos of the great ring road around Paris or the roads in central Paris or any big city for that matter is gross.  However to a French driver all our rules are a bit of a bind.  I would imagine that pedestrians have to cross these road with more of an adventurous spirit too.  There may be solid reasons for these differences and there is no right or wrong.

So if you translate this into other acts of niceness and consquences - go on just think about it.

So it could be harder than you think to be really nice.

Andrea lowe

Hypnotherapist and Trainer

Can you help?

Have you got time on your hands and an interest in what we do?  We are on the look out for volunteers  It gets a bit hectic around here and we sometimes have to pull out all the stops and multi-task but we're friendly, like a laugh and have fun

We are especially looking for help for our psychic night. You will get to go to some of the group things  for free if you are one of our helpers.  We want people to do things  like being on the door and handing out drinks etc or guiding people to the right place.

Who knows if you make yourself indispensible we may offer you a job (that's if you want one of course)
email  or phone 0161 764 1440 and ask for Andrea or Barry to find out more.

Lunchtime yoga sessions are becoming increasingly popular and are frequently being offered in the workplace.

Many companies now recognize the value of yoga and are even offering classes to their employees as part of their stress reduction and corporate wellness programs during the workday.

According to Yoga Journal, such companies include Chase Manhattan Bank, Forbes, HBO, GE, Wall Street brokerage firms, and dozens of Fortune 500’s like Nike, Apple, Harpo, Motorola, Google, Forbes, and General Motors!

The benefits of yoga for the employees include improved concentration, decision-making and multi-tasking skills, improved alertness and productivity and the ability to react more calmly in demanding situations. In addition yoga can relieve head, neck and back strain, carpal tunnel syndrome, insomnia, high blood pressure and work-related injuries from repetitive motion, sedentary job environments and/or lifting and moving objects. All these things lead to more a more productive, harmonious work environment and leave you feeling happier in the afternoons.  Jonathan Cain

Yoga has always been able to help people sleep better and now scientific evidence is building to support these claims.

More than half of us struggle to nod off and women are three times more likely than men to suffer say new statistics from the Great British Sleep Survey, which suggests the nation's health is suffering as a result of insomnia.

Professor Espie of Glasgow University, co-founder of sleep organisation Sleepio, which commissoned the survey, said the results pointed to a "real medical issue that should be taken seriously".

A quarter of those with insomnia had suffered for more than 11 years and it brings added costs to the NHS in sleeping medication prescriptions

After it's all over time to draw the raffle

Happy people feeling great after donating to charity and getting a great yoga experience

With time for a chat with amonst old friends and new found ones too.

Some a bit camera shy

Whilst others are up for it

And yet more unaware

Is this like the fishermans tale?

Browsing the goods

And a big sigh of relief for a successful day